yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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