Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
