Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
