she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize