I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize