have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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