Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
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