I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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