so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
