I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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