she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
