Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
