Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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