Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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