You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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