is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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