If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
