used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
