Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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