and she was petting her beer can
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
