I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
