Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
