I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
