We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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