it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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