You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize