im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
