8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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