How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
We had sex on a dog bed..
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize