even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
God I need to hump something, right now.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
