I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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