Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize