whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
