Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
