im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Randomize
