im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I would ride that face into the sunset
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
