She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
