i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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