Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
