Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
