if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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