HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
