i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
