Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
