There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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