So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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