Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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