if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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