No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
you win again, gameday.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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