I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
