This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Randomize
