You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Randomize
